Another Wedding Homily

I celebrated my second wedding recently. Again, I've changed the name of the bride and groom. (I wonder if posting these homilies is 'keeping me honest' - it makes it less likely that I'll be tempted to recycle them.)
Jer 31:31-34 Ps 144:8-10.15.17-18 1 Jn 4:7-12 Matt 5:1-12

The Exchange of Hearts
After Jennifer and George exchange their vows, they will symbolise this new commitment to each other by the exchange of tokens. And when we were discussing the ceremony, and running through the various options in the rite they told me that they would be exchanging heart-shaped tokens, this brought to mind a few half-forgotten verses:

My true-love hath my heart, and I have his,
By just exchange one for the other given.
I hold his dear, and mine he cannot miss:
There never was a bargain better driven.
His heart in me keeps me and him in one;
My heart in him his thoughts and senses guides:
He loves my heart, for once it was his own;
I cherish his because in me it bides.

In this prayer by the Elizabethan courtier Sir Philip Sidney, the dividing line between religious devotion and romantic poetry seems to fade away. And this is no surprise, because, as we heard in the second reading, God is love. This is the great truth which underpins all of Scripture. A German theologian called Joseph Ratzinger once described the Bible as being the great love story between God and humanity. Creation, the coming of Jesus Christ, his sacrifice for us, and his promises to us; they only makes sense in as much as we understand them as being an expression of love.

Something Ordinary and Extraordinary
Now, I don't want you to think that I’m ‘up in the clouds’ or talking about abstractions when I speak about God and love. Nothing could be further from the truth! When the Bible talks about God and love, it does so in order that we might understand the real meaning of the most basic and important things that we come up against everyday.

Love makes the Difference
You see, we are here to witness George and Jennifer exchange their vows – to commit themselves to life-long faithful companionship as husband and wife. On one level, this is the most natural thing in the world, on another it is an extraordinary act of trust and hope in the future. Because Jennifer and George are making a big commitment to each other. I’m sure they’re a little bit nervous… but they’re also happy, able and willing to make these promises to each other. Precisely because they have grown to love each other, they have come to make this big commitment and make it joyfully. When we speak about the power of love, we’re not speaking empty words… in George and Jennifer we see that this God-given power of love, has prepared them and made them capable of making a real commitment that we applaud them for.

The Meaning of the Marriage Vows
And when they make this commitment, they’ll be using some very realistic and down-to-earth words:

for better, for worse,
for richer, for poorer,
in sickness and in health

The future is unpredictable… and one might be tempted to take the negative point of view, and ask whether it’s possible for a couple to commit themselves

for better, for worse,
for richer, for poorer,
in sickness and in health

However, love comes first… and love prevails over all circumstances… and if we bear that in mind we realise that the vows that they make to each other come before these circumstances of better or worse, richer or poorer, sickness and health. It is because they have bound themselves to each other that they can faithfully face whatever life has in store for them knowing that because of the exchange of hearts they will have the other to rely upon. The bond of marriage is a binding-together that makes them both stronger. George, you will always have Jennifer to support you. Jennifer, you will always have George to rely on.

A Sacramental Writing on Each Other's Heart
Our first reading speaks of God writing on the hearts of the people he has chosen – a sign of love and closeness. When George and Jennifer exchange their vows, they write on each other’s heart. Their life together will be a communion of hearts. What they do today is the beginning of something which they will be continuing for the rest of their lives.

The Life-long Necessity to Renew this Sacrament
George and Jennifer – I encourage you to cherish this day. Keep the memories of this day alive to remind yourselves of where your priorities lie, and where joy is to be found in this life. Remember to keep giving your hearts to each other, and to always cherish the gift of the other’s heart.

The Vocation of Married Love
This is how you will continue to grow more deeply in love as a couple, how you will best face life with confidence, how you will learn to be good parents, friends, family-members and neighbours to those around you. The living-out of this day is where your joy and satisfaction are to be found. It will involve hard work, there will be ups and downs, but the important thing is to remember that from this day forth you will always have each other.

Our second reading ends with the following words:

As long as we love one another
God will live in us
And his love will be complete in us.

Take these words to heart, know that this congregation is with you and that you have a special place in the thoughts and prayers of those friends and family who cannot be here today.
Your family and friends support and encourage you, the Church blesses you with the blessing of Christ.
May the adventure of married love which you begin today, bring you joy and fulfilment, in this world and the world to come.